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Mommy Guilt...

Whenever I am doing something for one child I feel like I am shortchanging the other one.

GHR

Comments

qtrhorserider
Mar. 1st, 2009 10:57 pm (UTC)
Just remember that not doing for one because the other one either doesn't need it right now or is too old or not old enough, is short changing that kid. Eventually, they pick up on this and hoo boy the resentment that starts playing out. This is still the dynamic between my sisters and myself, and at least one of us has hit the half century mark.

Besides, it's more important that they learn that fairness does not equal mirror image. There'll come a time when "yes, your sister got to stay home and color today and you didn't" is acceptable when you also point out that "but you didn't spend half your time today in the bathroom being sick, now, did you?" Or, "you didn't need new shoes, she did and when you do I'll let you pick." Or, "you picked the movie last time", or "the two of you won't die because the kid down the street has one and you don't." As long as in the overall picture, they know that their needs are being met, you're ok.

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